it ain’t over til its over…
Realised I have not been conscientiously updating my blog, and not because i have ran out of things to write about.
I have always used this as an avenue for me to vent my frustrations or share my joys, and the past one month has been no lack of frustrations…. short of joys.
As Lillian Too has quite accurately said in her “Fortune & Feng Shui 2010” , the year of the Tiger is going to be tough one for monkeys. To be very honest, while i enjoy reading these fortune and fengshui stuff… i never really believed them, neither do I follow them. But i can’t help marveling at how much of what has happened has got so much parallels with book.
There’s been a whirlwind of events since the lunar new year, and I am seriously struggling to keep my head above the water. I am trying to keep my spirits up, as I know the journey ahead will be rather bumpy.
I started the year losing a very dear friend… my dog… and his passing is something, till today, we are not able to talk about in the family. He left us rather quickly, although we found out he was like a ticking time bomb, ready to explode any moment, with no signs at all. And one thing i regret is not following my family to the mount pleasant to at least spend his last few moments with him.
When i returned to the office, i noticed a huge dip in morale of many people dear to me. Obviously, I am no exception. I reckon the constant change and the noticeably less local environment have taken a toil on all of us. Everyone is simply unhappy. For me… i just don’t know what to do about it.
Project B’s also not really working out. I started the year with the hope of little meens or little hwas taking shape…. not until i agreed to go for a HSG. Well… to speak the truth, although I was able to see the result instantly during the procedure, i wasn’t at all affected at that point. I was actually more afraid of the procedure, and nothing else. Hence, it was a relief to get it over and done with…. and was quite positive that no surgery of sorts is required. But, reality struck me when i went to saw my gynae 5 days after the procedure only to be told to seriously consider a laproscopy to increase my chances of having kids. I hate hospitals… and i have absolutely no courage to put myself tru the ordeal of a surgery albeit only a day one.
I guess….i need more than courage at this point, and it has only been a month since the tiger came roaring in.
I know things are not over until i call it quits…. hence i am definitely pressing on, and at times like this, I am grateful for the love of my friends and family. And…although i don’t say this enough… Mr Lim… I love you, and thanks for always supporting me.
It really ain’t over til it’s really over. Time for me to hit the sack. :)