Skip to main content

A gentle note to self

I have been having a depressive mummy week. It all started with Jonas (J) being ultra fussy at the beginning , and a heated argument with the man at midweek. It all felt too much for me that I wished someone will just take my son away. Felt rather useless and somehow was convinced that I am never going to make this new life work. Funny thing was, a friend of mine who had her son just 3 weeks after I had J, had the exact same sentiments of how hard it is to be a mum. We devilishly devised a plan to set our sons up for adoption with a "buy-one-get-one free" offer. I offered to do the ad copy, while she worked on the ad design. Ah well... injecting some humour while trying to make myself feel better.

Who on earth ever said being a mum is easy! This must have been the most exhuasting time of my life. And a time where I can't seem to find the usual confident me.  Being a wife is already tough... what more a mum... kill me please!

J turns 2 months old today. As I lie by his side, looking at how hard he is trying to settle himself for a nap without any cuddles, overwhelmed me with guilt on my earlier thoughts of hoping he will just disappear. Posting this here acts as a reminder that things will get better. Although I don't know when, I have to keep telling myself to push on.

P.S. I wasn't serious about sending my son away. I love him no matter what..:)


  1. Anonymous10:45 am

    Hellow New Mommy,

    Hang it there! I was like you. Prepared everything for my son except for the lacking of sleep! I was totally not prepared for the lacking of sleep. How come nobody tells me??!! As a usual I got headaches, bodyaches and the utimate was I am diabetics after giving birth. I love my son but I don't enjoy him during his two years. Looking back, I realise the problem was I am a perfectionist. I wanted to do things my way and feel that others don't understand or don't know any better than his mommy. As a result i was too exhausted to enjoy my son. Looking back if I were to delegate my job to others or leaves him crying a while longer while i enjoy my coffee or lunch no harm will be done. Maybe better for him and me cause I be happier and not so tense around him. He will be happier too with a happy mommy. As for the sleep, bear with it a bit. By the 3rd month, he will have longer sleep at night. You find that you can sleep 3 to 4 hrs uninterupted then. If you are lucky, he will drops one night feed by then. Jia You. Gosh I miss those days...


Post a Comment

Thank you for reading! I love comments, so leave me one or perhaps a couple!

Popular posts from this blog

Yilan for kids - Taiwan Travelogue

Our recent trip to Taiwan brought us to Yilan. Although we initially worried that it will be boring for the boy as it is more of a "back to nature" part of Taiwan, we enjoyed ourselves very much, and wished we spent more time there. Surprisingly, Yilan packs more fun for the kid than expected.

Here's some places you can check out if you are going down that way and I will let the pictures do the talking! 

My thoughts on the Glenn Doman Learning Method

When I was invited to attend a baby learning seminar about the Glenn Doman Learning Method , I wasn't prepared to feel what I did after that.

There were fleeting thoughts in that 3 hours for me to leave my job to be at home with J.

I also had my heart swell with pride despite not having been the most conscientious mum in helping my son to learn. Yet the time he spent in school has helped him reach all his developmental and learning milestones.  

Fun for kids in the West of Singapore- Part 1

My family moved to the western part of Singapore when I was 3 years old. For as long as I can remember , I have lived here, and will likely continue to for an even longer time.

At different points, people have asked me what's there to do here in the west as it seems so far away. The common comments I hear from friends while in school were "you live in tuas ah....the industrial area? " Or... "which kampong is that?".